Thursday, May 25. The moment I awaked,
‘Jesus, Master,’ was in my heart and in my mouth; and I found all my strength
lay in keeping my eye fixed upon him, and my soul waiting on him continually.
Being again in St. Paul’s in the afternoon, I could taste the good word of God
in the anthem, which began, ‘My song shall be always of the loving-kindness of
the Lord: with my mouth will I ever be showing forth thy truth from one
generation to another.’ Yet the enemy injected a fear, ‘If thou dost believe,
why is there not a more sensible change?’ I answered (yet not I), ‘That I know
not. But this I know, I have now peace with God, and I sin not today, and
Jesus my Master has forbid me to take thought for the morrow.’
‘But is not any sort of fear’,
continued the tempter, ‘a proof that thou dost not believe?’ I desired my
Master to answer for me, and opened his book upon those words of St. Paul,
‘Without were fightings, within were fears.’Then inferred I, well may fears
be within me; but I must go on, and tread them under my feet.